Most of us have an idea of what we want life to be like. We grow up wanting to be pop stars, lawyers, teachers, doctors and dancers. Then somewhere along the way, we step into reality and lose sight of the dreams we once had.
Okay, sometimes those dreams are a little far-fetched. Like wanting to be Beyonce when you’re tone deaf and can’t hold a note. Sorry babe, but you will never be Beyonce lol.
Lets just keep it real…
Most of the dreams we have earlier in life are DEFINITELY doable, but life has a way of tearing us down, making us feel defeated, and making us believe that the ideal life that we wanted for ourselves is not reachable, that it is not attainable, that it is not possible.
Some of us have no idea what our “ideal” life is. We are still wandering this Earth praying for a sign to show us who we are, what we are supposed to do, and why we were put here in the first place. We want to have purpose, we want to make a difference, and maybe above all, we want to be happy.
That brings us to wonder… What is the TRUE definition of happiness? We have to realize that happiness has a different meaning for every single woman on the planet. One woman may say that she is most happy when she is at home raising her children and not working. Another woman might say that happiness is having time to be with family while also traveling the world. We are all unique and happiness can have so many meanings.
So, how exactly do we go about working toward our dreams, our ideal lives, and true happiness?
First, decide what that looks like for YOU!
What have you always dreamed of doing? How do you see yourself living your life on a daily basis? What aspects of life make you happiest? Being around family? Traveling the world? Having and taking care of children? Being single? Working out? Being creative? Making your own schedule?
Ask yourself these questions and make a list of your answers. It might just turn into a list of extremely random things that would make life great for you. But, look at that list and really think about how you could compile all of that into one lifestyle.
NEVER make life decisions to please others.
Sometimes we tend to live our lives for other people. In high school, family want you to become a lawyer because your cousin is a lawyer and he makes a lot of money. So you major in political science. Your dad wants you to be a star athlete. So, you try out for basketball even though you really want to try out for dance squad. We cannot continue to make life decisions based on the happiness it will bring other people, even if these are people that we love. Because at the end of the day, they do not have to live your life, they do not have to go to your job, they do not have to deal with the pressures life will bring you. Period.
Make a plan, stick to it and be patient!
We all want happiness. We all want our lives to be exactly how we want it to be. But sometimes getting to that place takes time and hard work. If you want to be a beauty blogger who gets free products, gets invited to lavish events and travels the world, you have to start from the bottom. You must work hard af, be consistent and be PATIENT! Greatness takes time and you have to start somewhere.
If you want to be a wife and stay-at-home mother who either works from home or makes her own schedule, you have to make strides now to make that happen! I mean you could always set all your hopes on marrying a rich fine ass doctor, having his babies and living happily ever after, but lets be real. That barely ever happens in real life lol. Make a plan to start your own business that revolves around one of your passions! Then, by the time you get married and have children, maybe you can actually raise them from home how you want because you are your own boss!
Achieving your ideal life may not be as easy as just taking a job you hate and being financially secure. Sometimes, we have to work for what we really truly want. Where is the happiness in working a job you HATE 5-6 days a week for the rest of your life??? Makes no sense. YOLO. Choose happiness boo.
Make small changes NOW!
What can you do now that will make you happy? It’s always great to work towards the future, but what about today? You can start to live some aspects of that ideal life now. Does it make you happy to spend more time with family? Then plan some quality time with them. Do you see yourself as a fitness trainer in your ideal life? Then take a class or find some fitness trainers and pick their brain. Do you want to get married and have children? Stop dating fu*&boys with no ambition, goals or plans for you. Make any changes you can that will change the NOW, then it will ultimately change your LATER.
Be kind to yourself. You will get there 🙂
It’s not fun feeling stuck. Stuck in a dead-end job that you despise. Stuck in a relationship that is going absolutely nowhere. Stuck dealing with fake and hateful friends. Stuck doing things you really don’t want to do to make other people happy. That is no way to live babygirl. But, sometimes it takes a while to get out of situations in order to move on to the next stage in life. The first step is to acknowledge your unhappiness. Then, make a commitment yo yourself to change your circumstances.
Above all, be kind to yourself along the way. While you are working on your business everyday after work, try not to continue complaining about how much you hate your day job. While you are trying to lose weight, don’t look in the mirror and tear yourself and your body down when you are consistently eating right, working out and dropping pounds! No point in complaining about our misfortunes if we are actively working towards your ideal life and happiness. Love yourself and be kind to yourself during the journey. Try to find some happiness NOW and it will motivate you to want even more later.
Want your ideal life? Start working towards it today. Happiness is a choice, and so is defeat. Choose wisely.